What’s On My Mind

I heard a disturbing story from a friend here locally who was explaining the new way the Middle School is going to be grading Mathematics this year and I have been thinking about it throughout the day.  I think it has been on my mind to the point of it distracting me from a positive round of golf in a charity tournament today.  I putted great, hit good wedges and 9 irons, but the rest of my game was awful.  I think I was restless in my thoughts and my focus was just not there.  As we get older, the one thing that never happens is that no one ever sits us down and tells us that we will live the next 30 years of our lives on a daily thread that seems as though we wake up to walk upon a high wire.  There is no warning for the things that hit us.  They just hit us at 100 hundred miles an hour like a stray bullet and we have to pick ourselves up and adjust to our new reality.  That really is the situation.  Our reality is constantly changing as we age and we grasp to try to figure out how to deal with it.  For some, the quest is if I can just make a little more money; for others, it is if I can just get through the next paycheck unscathed; for the rest, it is how can I get to my next meal and how can I provide. 

What bothers me the most about these days is not that it seems we are more and more dependent on government (although I think that is happening), what bothers me is that we are closing ourselves off as people.  The technological age has been a great awakening for us but the unintended consequence is that we no longer have to talk face to face and that society is depersonalizing (don’t if that is a word) everyday. 

As I played golf today, the Dow Jones Industrial average went into a tailspin.  It appears that all the credit charges that have taken place in Europe for the last thirty years are coming to an end.  The problem is that it isn’t a household or single bank without the money, it is a collection of countries who have sold their citizenry on money so they could retain power of the citizenry. 

On the macro level we have dissent in economics and on the micro level, here at home, we have teacher’s who openly state that they wish they could just deal with the kids because parents are problematic.  We teach math now in words instead of numbers and wonder why we don’t compete. 

The strange feeling to all of this is I wonder if my Dad felt this way at 42?  Was the way of things screwed up in his eyes because if they were, then I feel with certainty that at some point we will go supernova and explode, but if he didn’t feel this way and things were in a natural progression, then it hasn’t taken long at all for our existence to get really fucked up. 



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